Wednesday, May 6, 2009
The Blitz Is On
Driving is considered to be a privilege by most.
However, lately it seems to be more of an inconvenience
with the large amounts of cops on Toronto's streets.
The cops have been dispersing themselves all over our
city in an attempt to reach their quota that they have
fallen behind on. What does this mean for us? More
traffic tickets for drivers. So if you think you might
get lucky and worm you're way out of your next ticket,
guess again.
The 1st of May also introduced tougher laws for impaired
drivers. If you're not already aware, blood alcohol level
warning range is in between 0.05 to 0.08. What once
used to be a 12 hour license suspension will not be a three
day suspension for first time offenders; the infractions for
second and third time offenders will increase.
Now, if you're charged with one of two offences - driving
while impaired with a BAL over 90 milligrams (for every
100 milligrams of alcohol), you're license is automatically
suspended for 90 days. If convicted, you receive an additional
suspension of one year and you'll have to complete a program
call "Back on Track, Ontario's Remedial Measures Program.'
This program costs $475 plus GST and takes 10 months to
complete. And just when you think it couldn't get any more
fucked........you pay an additional $100 to have your license
reinstated.
Discouraging isn't it? The moral of the story - Be cautious
on the roads and travel smart. Going through all this bullshit
isn't worth it.
*For more information on the new laws check out the Ontario
Highway Traffic Act.
Tahiry ...
If you haven't heard the name yet ... you will!
Also known as "that ass", "who's that" ... most commonly as "Budden's girl".
This is a girl on the come up, you heard it here first ... well maybe not ... but you heard it here!
Tahiry Buddens ... you get two swords up!
PS ... don't get it twisted Joe is not distracted, he's still putting out good music. TRUST ME!
check http://www.joebuddentv.com/
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
City Watch
Laws, laws and more laws. Just when we thought it
couldn't get any worse, the city is thinking about
implementing a ban on making right turns at 10
intersections prone to pedestrian accidents.
WOW!!!!!
This Just In.....
African's have the world's greatest genetic variation.
African's have more genetic variation than anyone else
on Earth, according to a new study that helps narrow the
location where humans first evolved.
The largest study of African genetics ever undertaken also
found that nearly three-fourths of African-Americans can
trace their ancestry to West Africa.
For more information on this study click here.
Reality TV: The Curse
Has anyone noticed that once stars hit reality tv
that their relationships fall apart. Look at the archives
and see what I mean.
Newlyweds: Nick and Jessica
Tha Couple: Nick Lachey & Jessica Simpson
Aired: August 2003 - March 2005
Divorced: December 2005, Finalized June 2006
Being Bobby Brown
Tha Couple: Bobby Brown & Whitney Houston
Aired: June 2005
Divorce: April 2007
Hogan Knows Best
Tha Couple: Hulk Hogan & Linda Hogan
Aired: July 2005
Divorced: November 2007
The Joneses
Tha Couple: Nasir Jones & Kelis
Aired: 2 episodes were filmed in 2007 but was cancelled
by MTV before they could be aired
Divorced: Papers filed April 2009
Mother's Day Gift Ideas
With 5 days to go, Mother's Day is just around the corner.
We all love our mothers and every year it's a hustle to do
something special for the woman who has everything. Here
are the top 5 gift giving ideas for Mother's Day 2009.
1. Create a scrapbook: This can include past and present
pictures of your mother, and other family members. Take
note of special events - past birthdays and special occasions.
Remind her that you haven't forgotten all that she's done for
you.
2. Give the gift of family: Dedicate the day to your mom.
Take her out to brunch, make sure she stays off her feet and
spend quality time with her that you can't provide any other
day out of the year.
3. Giver her a certificate for a nutritionist or personal trainer:
As our mother's get older, it's obvious that their health isn't what
it used to be. Help your mom to stay healthy by buying her one
session to get her health up to speed.
4. Treat her to a complete Makeover: Let her get her hair and nails
done and to top it off, surprise her with a Mother's Day Outfit.
done and to top it off, surprise her with a Mother's Day Outfit.
5. Mother's Day Photo Shoot: Let your mom get all glammed up and
let her take portraits of herself and the family. She'll feel like a real
supermodel.
Public Service Announcement: I do?
" I have always wanted to get married and have a big wedding. "
"Why? Didn't you know that most couples that get married don't last, just look at......"
STOP!!! Have you heard this before?
What's the deal with marriage these days?
Isn't it suppossed to be a sacred bond between a man and a woman. A bond that is everlasting.
Isn't it suppossed to be a time of happiness and joy? I don't know but, some people these days seem to be very cynical when it comes to marriage and other people's happiness.
As time progresses and we all get older marriage seems to be the topic of conversation at one point or another. Here is the best advice we at Two Grasshoppers can give you is to keep it to yourself, lie about your opinion or quickly change the subject.
Whatever marriage means to you is your business. If you are a person who believes in getting married or does not believe in getting married that is your perspective and I respect that.
What seems to leave me confused is everyone having an opinion about why or why not one should get married and the negative connotation that comes with it these days.
The media has done a great job at pushing sex down our throats and also the fact that cheating on your girlfriend or boyfriend is acceptable which would explain people's mentality these days.
So for all my potential husbands and wives out there who are thinking about, have thought of or going to think about getting married. Silence is golden. Actions speak louder than words. Or just plain and simple do what you want and let the haters hate.
Regards,
Sean Salty Sax
Monday, May 4, 2009
Get Ready to Wine
With Caribana just 3 months (I know can you believe it?),
everyone is getting excited for the August 1st parade.
Guys are getting toned in the gym for that wife beater and
shorts look and of course the ladies are getting in shape
to play mas.
To give you a preview of what's in store for this year,
Two Grasshoppers will be updating you with all of the
pre-jump up events, including the various band
launchings that will be taking place this month.
Check out last years band of the year The Toronto
Revellers courtesy of Picture Man Productions!
The Pick Up
interesting experiences as a female who gets picked
up by males. I'll incorporate my thoughts and advice to
improve your pick up tactics. So listen up fellas.
This weekend I was in the LCBO picking up a few things
when I was approached by a rather bulky male. The
Introduction: "I just wanted to let you know that I think
you're absolutely gorgeous" (said with extra pizaz!). My
reply: "Thank you," as I continue trying to pick out my liquor
selection for the night. Most would stop with that one line
but not Mr. LCBO. "You do know that you're gorgeous
right? Right?
Lesson #1: I heard you the first time.
My thought process is now jumbled because he's
interrupted me more than once. "So what are you're
plans for tonight? Staying in with the boyfriend huh?"
My reply: "Yes I am."
Lesson #2: I'm taken.
"Well my name is (his name). It was nice meeting you."
I breathe a sigh of relief in my mind because I can finally
get back to my liquor selection. "You did get my name
right?"
Lesson #3: Now, you're just coming off as being
desperate. I'm not deaf.
All in all, it was a nice way to approach a lady but you
came up to desperate. I said I had a boyfriend, that should
have stopped him in his tracks.
Honourable Mention: ICE T
The Pre Review: The best and worst of movies I haven't seen yet
I know this movie has been out for a few weeks now, but don't think for a minute it's flown under the radar. I'm sure the producers would like you to believe this is thriller like Disclosure (starring Michael Douglas and Demi Moore) more so than it is a move about race and culture as they pertain to relationships like Do the Right Thing. Either way we'll go along with them and take the movie at face value. Idris Elba an up and coming actor (seen in such recent films as American Gangster, Prom Night and Rock and Rolla), plays husband to Beyonce Knowles (known more for her singing talents and show performance then acting). Elba, a white collar worker in corporate America, encouters a temptress at work in the name of Ali Larter (who seems to always play the crazy "obsessed" girl, pardon the pun, example whip cream scene from Varsity Blues and even her guest spot on Entourage). Larter, will stop at nothing to try and have Elba, and this does not go over very well with Knowles; to the point where their interactions inevitably become physical.
So the review, is the movie predictable? Yes. Is it exciting and thrilling? Yes. Groundbreaking? No. Worth your 109mins, plus the cost of admission and definitely popcorn (because you'll need to be doing something to distract you from Beyonce's less than Oscar winning performance); that'll be up to you to decide.
I rate it 2 stars ... 1 for the sexy, and 1 for the depiction of a "real life" situation regardless of how crazy it makes woman seem.
This movie is only a must see if you've never been in a relationship before, or if you don't know that with love comes jealousy. Shit ... you know what, on that note, EVERYONE should see this movie. Bringing truth to the saying that there's a thin line between love and stupidity.
Sunday, May 3, 2009
Say It Ain't So: Nas and Kelis Divorce
Yes it is true. A little birdies has confirmed that Kelis has filed divorce papers against Nasty Nas. I hope he signed a pre-nup agreement.
Hollllaaaaaaa
Friday, May 1, 2009
10 Worst Jobs of 2008
- Telemarketing
- Retail
- Prostitute
- Nike Shoe Factory
- McDonald's
- Tim Horton's Drive Thru
- Camp Counselor
- Assistant Administrative Assistant
- Squeegie Kid
- George Bush's Assistant
Two Grasshoppers: Top 10 R & B Songs to listen to in the summertime.
- R.Kelly- Feelin On Your Booty (Remix)
- Roger Troutman- Computer Love
- Bobby Brown- Rock With You Baby
- H-Town- Knockin the boots
- 112-Cupid
- 112- Only You
- Next- Butta Love
- Next- Too Close
- New Edition- Hit Me Off
- Keith Sweat- Make It Last Forever
Two Grasshoppers: Top 10 Songs to listen to in the summertime.
- Fresh Prince & DJ Jazzy Jeff- Summertime
- Master Ace - I.N.C Ride
- Dr.Dre & Snoop Dogg- Ain't Nuthin But A G Thang'
- Jay Z feat. UGK- Big Pimpin'
- Bravehearts- Oochie Wally
- Jadakiss feat. Snoop Dogg- Cruisin'
- Snoop Dogg- Gin N' Juice
- Notorious B.I.G- Juicy
- DMX- How's It Going Down
- LL COOL J- Around The Way Girl
- LL COOL J- Loungin (Remix)
- Souls Of Mischief-93' Til Infinity
The Unwritten rules of relationships
- Don't fall in love with the sex
- Don't fall in love too quickly
- Don't fall in love with someone who doesn't love you back
- Be honest with yourself
- Don't pretend or act out of character
- Leave room for mistakes, be understanding
- Have patience
- Understand the different types of relationships
- Put yourself in the other persons shoes
- Know your partner
Kobe Shits on the Raptors!!!!
This was just downright embarassing. Gotta love Kobe though, he is definitely a great basketball player and a magnificent candidate for the 'Certified Asshole' award. Stay tuned.
The Pre Review: The best and worst of movies I haven't seen yet
I'm sure you've all seen the previews where Channing Tatum (the gangsta white boy from the dancing movie - "Step up 2: The Streets" and the high school basketball movie "Coach Carter") plays a down on his luck country boy, new to big and crazy New York city. Making money to get by, he sells bootleg DVDs on the street, until one day he gets caught in a street fight, no doubt for some of his goods. Terrence Howard (the smooth talking pimp and aspiring rapper - "Hustle and Flow" and the light skinned brother in the Navigator - "Crash" and pretty much every other within the last 3-5yrs), spots this young man, instantly noticing his skill as a bare-knuckle brawler. Offering him the ultimate bait, the promise to make money, instantly formed a modern day Don King, Mike Tyson type relationship, and if you see the movie you'll learn why.So my review ... I give this movie 3 stars, 1 star for the eye candy both male and female + 1 star for the action sequences (after all mixed martial arts is all the rage right now) and + 1 for it being predictable enough that the audience will not get confused.
Recommendation ... good date movie, as long the girl is not a priss, also a good guys night out movie. Do guys have nights out? ... I don't know, but you know what I mean. It'll be adrenaline pumping and testosterone right.
I wonder if there will be fights in the lobby or parking lot afterwards, like Corolla drivers doing burn outs after seeing "Fast and Furious".
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