Hold yourself accountable

"Do not expect of someone, what you wouldn't expect of yourself." -That Guy

That's not meant to be a deep, reflective statement, but that's what just came to mind as I sat here and contemplated.

My frustration with woman and dating has been well documented throughout my posts, if you haven't caught on to that, then reread them. But, I can't help but wonder if I'm not partially to blame for the monsters I've created. No, I didn't make them self-conscious, stubborn, bitter, recently divorced, widowed or frustrated with dating, but I have perpetuated those feelings, I think.

It's not easy for me to hold myself accountable for anything having to do with these creatures, but I figured I'd give them some benefit of the doubt and man up.

For example:

• If you know that someone is an alcoholic and you invite them to your wine tasting party, you have to hold yourself partially responsible for them falling off the wagon, no?
• If you know someone that is "on a diet" and struggling with their food "addiction", maybe having your dinner party at The Mandarin (chinese buffet) was not the best idea?

And in my case:

• If I know this person is in to me, while I'm not in to them, more than just for "some fun", yet I continue to "have fun" with them, I should expect some fallout or ramifications to my actions right? The least of which are excessive phone calls, BB msgs, random comments and hints to the feelings or wantings of more.

Let's get real, it's easy for me to take my normal approach, reasoning and thought process, that this person is a grown up, an individual that should be able to make their own choices and life decisions, right?

But, me knowing their weakness to chocolate like a diabetic or for rum to an alcoholic, krytonite to Superman, white girls to black guys, sex to a Eric Benet; should make me more aware and cautious in my actions. I should be more mindful of what I'm doing, saying, inferring or suggestion with my action or inaction.

While I expect this person to know better, to know that this "is what it is", that we are just friends, that "I don't like you like that", I'm sure they also expect me to do the same; ignore the fact that their mouth is not in connection with their actions, that their feelings are free flowing like Niagara Falls, that their emotional instability teamed with their genetic makeup will not allow them to act and be as I am.

This revelation encourages me to, take a breath before blowing my top and take a bigger breath before answering that call or message. Be honest with myself and with them too. Is it really that hard to realize, "I'm just not that into you?"