Being single..

It's not all its cracked up to be ... trust me.

There's a myth that single life is a bed of roses, that you can date whoever you want, don't have to answer to anybody, tell them where you are or are going, don't have to watch movies you don't want you or go on double dates or out for your girl/boyfriends friends birthdays or dinners. We can constantly be on the prowl, flirting and fooling around with whomever we like, partying with a girl today, a lady tomorrow, and a cougar next week.

While many of these things ARE true, it is not a bed of roses. Every individual situation is different I guess and it's not fair or right to generalize, but here's what I think.

If you are in a relationship and you are envious of me who is not, there's something wrong in your relationship! You should not be with someone that makes you want to be alone. Make sense? Why are you dating someone that makes you wish you could date other people? It's better you part ways and do as you like, play the field, go on dates, meet new people and be free to do as you please (guilt free), then continue in an unhappy relationship.

Being single is great for a while, usually when you're fresh out of a long term or bad relationship, it brings a feeling of relief and freedom like walking out of prison after a 5yr bid. For me that quickly wears off, not because I'm love sick or desperate to fall in love or get married, but because "playing the field" is tiring, expensive and disheartening. The longer you're single, the more people you tend to meet that tempt you to revert back to your ex or consider becoming a monk or nun. (I'm joking.) But anyone who has been single for a while, knows what I mean.

The longer you date without "success", meaning finding a good partner or long term fit, you start to categorize people after or during your first date. The more practice you get the better you will be at accurately grouping these individuals. As the waiter or waitress is placing our entrees on the table, I have an idea if I'm feeling this young lady or not, she's categorized as "money hungry", "immature", "love sick" and more so than that, if she's worth a second date.

Don't misunderstand me, I'm not suggesting what I do, or how I see things is right. But, so far I don't think it's wrong. I'm often questioned "Why don't you give woman more chances?". To which I usually reply, "When you know ... you know!" For example, if you do something or something is part of you that I really don't like or can't get over, (smoking, excessive drinking, nose picking, ass scratching, sleeping around), I don't think there is any amount of time or future dates that will let me, "get used to it".

It's easy to think that the grass is greener on the other side of the fence and that I have life real sweat because I don't have a young lady pestering me, blowing up my phone, or constantly pawing at me, but if you were in my shoes, you'd have my problems of wasting money on first dates, driving home in awkward silences, holding your breath as they lean in for a kiss, wasting an outfit on a failed date and the list goes on.

Be happy in the life you lead, if you're not, work on figuring out why and fixing it.