This one is for the ladies ...

I have a serious question for all the ladies, if he's doing it to her or he did it to her, what makes you think that he won't do it to you?

I know I sound like an audience member on Maury or Tyra, but seriously, think about it.

I've heard stories of woman who meet a guy and start to fall for him or develop feelings, only to realize or later find out that he is married. (What would you do?) Those of you not in the situation will obviously answer emphatically, "End it!", but would you? The most recent story I can remember, she didn't end it because he convinced her that things with the wife were not good and that they were separated (but living together) and ultimately going to divorce.

Some of the female readers are reading this thinking, "Ok, so what's wrong with that?". The male readers are smiling to themselves, because they know where the guy is coming from, he's telling her what he knows she wants to hear. Think about it, would she be happy, comfortable or feel more relaxed if he said, "I just want to have a sex filled, adulterous affair with you for 1 month and then we can each return to our normal lives, pretending we never met." Probably, not!

So, believing and confiding in what he said, she continues to date this married man for weeks, months, years, until she soon realizes that he has not yet left his wife, he still lives with her in the same home they share with their child and while he makes time for her, he is not hers. While he tells her that he loves her and wants to be with her, buys her nice things, he is not making the moves necessary to commit to her.

But, again we come back to the original question or why would you want to be with him, in a long term, committed relationship? Are you so full of yourself to believe that he would cheat on his wife and disrespect his family, but not do the same to you when the honeymoon is over? When the excitement and challenge of having a mistress is gone?

Ultimately you have 2 choices, continue to be the loveless concubine or move on. I challenge you ladies to trust your instincts and to think with your mind and then your heart.

It's hard to see into the distance if you have an obstructed view, it's even harder if you don't open your eyes.