Wednesday, December 30, 2009

2009 Fashion Police



  1. Murses - What's that, you ask? A man's purse, European carry all, a man bag. All of which seem to have made a triumphant comeback this year replacing the long gone fanny pack. I don't know who thought this was necessary and what prey tell does a man need that can't fit in his pockets?

  2. Bandito Scarves - You know what I'm talking about. The scarves that look like table cloths, usually in white and some printed pattern. Men, woman, children, celebrities, homeless, bankers, drug dealers, were all wearing them. I refused to succumb to the societal pressure and if you did too: Bravo!

  3. Tight Pants - Ohhh how we at twograsshoppers have made our opinion of these garments known throughout the year. If your legs can't breath, if you can't bend your knees when you walk or can't sit down (like Kramer in that episode of Seinfeld), if you put your keys in your pocket and people across the room know you drive a Hyundai, they're too tight.

  4. Wallet Chain - Why? Just Why? Because it provides extra security? NO! It will more likely get you roughed up. Imagine you're a pick pocket and you grab someones wallet, which has a chain attached to it extending to their belt, imagine your annoyance! You would likely pull your victim to the ground by this same leash and beat them for being so lame!

  5. Nerd Glasses and attire - If you don't need glasses why are you wearing them? What's next using a wheel chair because it's easier than walking? Walking with crutches because you only stole the left shoe from Footlocker? You're sending false signals. You might actually have someone stop you and ask you a question because they think you're smart! Don't lead people on, nerd glasses for nerd, I mean people who are near or far sighted.

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